Born a loser

Despite what your parents might have told you over the years, there is one fact that you cannot escape: You are born to lose.

Everyone in this world is a loser in some way.

The thing about loss that really hits you, is that you're reminded of what you actually have. I, for instance, have lost a number of things over the past year. A partner, a dear friend, trust, self esteem, belief and some weight in the process.

But the things that we lose are very different from the ones that we lose. The people around us. The friends, the family, the sacred bonds of our social life. Once you lose them, the other things seem so tiny by comparison. You might have lost your phone, or a set of keys, but when you realize that someone that you've interacted with, learned from and shared some part of your life with aren't there anymore, you don't care if your phone is gone. You're just glad that there's still someone on the other end who picks up the phone when you call them.

And through my losses, I always gain something. Besides the obvious experience, you gain understanding and humility towards what really matters.

When I lost my dad, me and my brothers got in a fight over his apartment. We argued about whether or not we should take some of our earnings and fix up the place before we sold it, and not everyone was comfortable with that. I saw an investment opportunity and thought everyone else was along for the ride, but when I saw what the money issue did to the ones I cherish the most in my life, I changed my mind completely. There isn't a dollar in this world that will ever come between my brothers and me again. 

So, when faced with loss once again, a partner, a friend, and the trivial possessions I've taken for granted, I finally caved. And it was a good feeling. 

You see, when you get into the business of being your own boss, you don't get too many opportunities to be a pessimist. You don't get to doubt, or second guess things. You have to stay true to your beliefs, and always have a strong heart, a goal, and hopefully some strategy to get there. 

So succumbing to the feeling of being a loser for a day, got me thinking of what I actually have and how much I've gained. (Apart from the few pounds my seems to think I need..)

And for that insight I am thankful. 

I'm gonna wrap this rant up with one of my favorite lyrics from Bruce Springsteen's song "Thunder road". It sums up the barren lands between the loser you feel like, and the hero you want to be. 

"You can hide ’neath your covers and study your pain
Make crosses from your lovers, throw roses in the rain
Waste your summer praying in vain 
For a saviour to rise from these streets"

Look out for each other out there.